Less Than Incredible Tales from Next-door

We've moved in to our new house and become observers of unusual phenomena.  From the strange pipe sticking out of the one neighbour's house that at irregular intervals splashes out a tonne of water into their front yard from who-knows-where, to the older gal who orders a cab at least once a day only to sit in her driveway in it for 15-20 minutes, to the massive heaps of dog poo lying in the driveway of the same lady's driveway where they keep their 3 large canines in a cage when they have a perfectly nice back yard they could be using.

I'm amused by anything and I enjoy coming to my own conclusions, so this neighbourhood is a real fit for me. I think Miklos is okay with it too. He's been busying himself making this place look amazing and getting the rest of our stuff over here.  Last night he lay in a mess of the most static-y styrofoam we've ever seen, assembling my new laptop cart.  It came with a cable lock!  The cable lock probably cost as much as I paid for the cart total. I like it!

Oh good, my ganglion is hurting. This is atypical of it. Maybe it's emptying, after 7 years.  Ew, I just looked them up on Wikipedia and I can assure you I do not have it as bad as those weirdos.

Fish n Chips n Vinegar... Pepper Pepper Pepper, Salt.

I got this book for about $10 the other day at Coles. I realize I'm becoming the two-jobbed housewife, but what a great resource! There are like a bazillion tips on ways to use salt, vinegar, lemons, and baking soda for just about everything around the house; things you'd expect, and also neat tricks like making a pet behaviour-modifying spray out of one part vinegar and one part water. So far, so good.

Another thing I picked up was a travel journal. I can't wait to start filling it out. Six days til my first trip overseas. Eat shit, Quebec!

Addendum: I was wondering about this tonight, here's my answer.

Things That Are Stupid #12983

My nana forwarded this email on to me today:

If I happened to show up on your door step crying,
Would you Care?

If I called you and asked you to pick me up

because something Happened, Would you come?

If I needed a shoulder to cry on,
Would you give me Yours?

Do you know what the relationship is between your two eyes? They blink together, they move together, they cry together, They see things together and they sleep together,

BUT THEY NEVER SEE EACH OTHER...
that's what friendship is.
Life is lonely without FRIENDS

I'm pretty sure if anyone short of a blood-soaked, drooling hobo came to my door, I would care. (Even then, I'd be concerned. I'd shut the door and call the cops, but I'd still care.)

I'm pretty sure I'd pick anyone I knew up if something happened, as long as they weren't about to kill me.

I'm pretty sure I'd let anyone, again, short of a blood-soaked, drooling hobo, cry on my shoulder.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is, I must be a pretty great person. Or, if that email is true, that I am a friend to just about anybody short of a ... well you get it. I better inser the tongue-in-cheek tag here in case someone decides to take this seriously.

We did our first family photoshoot today for Osenoa; it went well, I think! We'll have a website up in the next little bit.

Also new, there is a mystery concerning my bedroom and how a thick ceramic wall hanging was broken in half, then carefully placed together again so that it looked like nothing ever happened. Pieces that had obviously broken off were nowhere in sight when I picked up the wall hanging that mysteriously split all the way down the middle on its own. "Remember the time he ate my goldfish? And you lied and said I never had any goldfish? Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? Why did I have the bowl??" I'm suspicious of my superintendents, since I find them walking in and out of the place sometimes. Wouldn't be altogether shocking. I'm there barely enough to care, but I do enjoy a good spine-tingler now and then!

Died of a Broken Heater

Lately I've been trying to refresh the place. It all started when my cannibal of an 'angelfish' died last week. Fuckin' right! Normally I wouldn't be so callous, nor so satisfied, when a 'pet' died, but let's face it: This thing killed and ate all the other fish he's lived with for 2 years. On several occasions (1) (2), I have only found parts of fish in my aquarium. So anyway, after eating Blinky just after I got home from the cottage, the angelfish decided to keel over. ("Must've choked on a bone," said Miki.)

I was amazed. I thought that bastard would never die. All his long (for a tropical fish) life, I never thought I'd see the day when he died. And then there he was... wedged under a plastic seaweed plant, done.

Promptly, he was flushed, and the aquarium at long last removed from my room. Today I was able to move stuff around in my room (not without an adventure) and ended up with a long crooked gash on my calf from my bedframe which [Ed. Note: Surprise!!!] was apparently broken off in one part I walked by. Anyway, it barely hurt, which is new for me, and it looks really gross and swollen and bloody and cool! And now my room's all changed around so I get to be totally confused when I wake up in the morning. All-right! Anyway my point is the change is refreshing. Etc. And scars-to-be are cool.

There's a meteor shower out there tonight, but as clear as the sky is in the city tonight, I can't see a thing. If I could though, this would be helpful.