Died of a Broken Heater

Lately I've been trying to refresh the place. It all started when my cannibal of an 'angelfish' died last week. Fuckin' right! Normally I wouldn't be so callous, nor so satisfied, when a 'pet' died, but let's face it: This thing killed and ate all the other fish he's lived with for 2 years. On several occasions (1) (2), I have only found parts of fish in my aquarium. So anyway, after eating Blinky just after I got home from the cottage, the angelfish decided to keel over. ("Must've choked on a bone," said Miki.)

I was amazed. I thought that bastard would never die. All his long (for a tropical fish) life, I never thought I'd see the day when he died. And then there he was... wedged under a plastic seaweed plant, done.

Promptly, he was flushed, and the aquarium at long last removed from my room. Today I was able to move stuff around in my room (not without an adventure) and ended up with a long crooked gash on my calf from my bedframe which [Ed. Note: Surprise!!!] was apparently broken off in one part I walked by. Anyway, it barely hurt, which is new for me, and it looks really gross and swollen and bloody and cool! And now my room's all changed around so I get to be totally confused when I wake up in the morning. All-right! Anyway my point is the change is refreshing. Etc. And scars-to-be are cool.

There's a meteor shower out there tonight, but as clear as the sky is in the city tonight, I can't see a thing. If I could though, this would be helpful.

Blinky: The Silent Cleaner

I got Blinky yesterday after resigning myself to the fact that my angelfish probably isn't going to die any time soon, and as such, he probably isn't going to start licking the algae he and his surroundings produce off the side of the aquarium. According to the place I bought him, Blinky is a 'rubber lip', which sounds kind of mafia-esque. He eats algae, and he does it quite well.

Thing is, since I got him, the dirt has dramatically disappeared, which is great, but I've seen Blinky about twice; the rest of the times I've looked for him (which are a bunch, I can assure you), I have come up short. He has a real knack for hiding in a place virtually unhide-in-able.

I have to give this guy some credit. When he does come out, I'm never around, and he does a hell of a job wiping the glass of his co-dweller's filth. He's like a phantom. A phantom who is really efficient at tidying up something I have no willingness whatsoever to do myself.

Oh and the free iced coffee from Tim Hortons (today only, from 12pm-5pm) went down smooth. Much better than McDonalds' iced coffee from days of yore (or two years ago when it premiered, anyhow, which is the last time I tried it).

In other news, job hunting? Not going so well! Are we shocked? I'm just plain shocked.

Operation Dumbo Drop

I'm getting up at 9 in the morning, no matter what. This late-night cycle has to end. Although it is the only time I'm sure I'll ever do my course reading for Labour Relations, because let's be honest: Who needs that shit during the daytime?? There is so much to be done. And I'm doing none of it. Snooze limit tomorrow: 5 times. Not 15. (I'm serious.)

Sometimes I see a light on in my house, and I almost walk past it, but then I think to myself, Suzuki is going to fuck your shit up one day, Comm-erson. Then I wise up and flip off the switch. But you won't see me not eating meat or wearing grain-fed horse manure for foundation anytime soon, that's for sure.

The two angelfish I got on Friday were ripped apart by the one angelfish I already had and his red-tailed shark friend. $11 well spent. Fate, I guess. I've been saying for a long time that once these two die, I'm going to empty the aquarium and never have fish again. It was wrong to think that I could go back on that vow.

Two roughly dressed people I didn't know at a sushi place tried to help my friend convince me to try Sake by saying "it's only 14% alcohol." When I joked that I stick mostly to guzzling Life Brand isopropyl, the woman laughed and said through blackened teeth "We were almost at that point once!"

Aw shit.

This just in:

One of my fish who I noticed was missing all day has turned up dead. Well, half of him has, but I haven't got much hope for the rest of him. So far, a string of a fish body has surfaced from beneath one of the plastic aquarium plants. The rest of his body and his head are yet to be found. Considering the other fish are only slightly larger than he was, and that they're not really aggressive, and that they've lived with him for months prior to this devastating incident, homicide has been ruled out. There was a recent water change and tank cleaning (no abrasive cleaning products were used, only warm water), and the water seemed slightly warmer than usual when I checked on it earlier (i.e., before the corpse was exhumed). From this given evidence, I can only conclude that the water became too hot for the fish and he, in turn, exploded. Then, his head fell off the face of the earth, because I haven't been able to find it anywhere. Then, he had the other fish (who somehow remained alive and healthy) bury him under a plant according to his unwritten fish will, because that's where I finally found him. Under a fucking plant and a bunch of gravel.

This shit is bananas.

Jack Nicholson now, or 1974?

These wisdom teeth come out on Tuesday. I am only now growing afraid. There will be two bones plucked from my head. Add to this also the fact that I never heal quickly, and as well that I whine like a baby from any sort of small pain, and we've got one terrifying endeavour lined up for Nikki this week.

In other news, the always pleasant Andrew stayed the weekend, and I actually got to spend time with him instead of working most of the time he was down (!!). There are never enough hours for us to spend together, even though we really did get to do a lot together this time. I made him a big breakfast on Saturday morning in celebration, and then we cooked a delectable steak dinner together by night! I should have every Saturday off!

In addition! He generously bestowed upon me a nice-sized aquarium, three gouramis (yellow honey, blue, and red) and a red-tailed shark, since he's wanted to get me fish for a while. We were going to get an angelfish and/or a jellybean parrot fish too, but I decided those are fish to aspire to, not to adopt when I'm poor and can't afford my own food, let alone $3 worth of fish flakes every few months.

Anyway, Rico has taken a shine to the fish. He spends great lengths of time batting at what appears to him to be colourful little blurs suspended in air. At last! I can (possibly) sleep at night without him meowing in my ear all the livelong night. Thank you, Andrew! For everything!

I have eggs to spend this week. Tomorrow I am making myself a pancake breakfast, and the next day too; they will be among the last semi-solids I will probably be eating for days.